The Anatomy of an Anxiety Attack by Anushka Bidani

it always starts at the tips of my fingers—

gentle shivers climbing up to my knuckles until

they vibrate in tandem; sparks of current

hiking on my palm until

my hand resembles a butterfly. i’m blue

& red, a rainbow split down the middle

spilling stains on every piece of skirt

& skin. “they don’t wash off,” my mother says,

“be more careful.” it spreads like ink

up to my knee until

i’m a sea in constant motion, with blots

at every corner. the sea has no corners. and so,

it twists and turns like vines down my leg, until

my little toe is swallowed up by the green;

i’m a forest, with no trees

no sun: an audience of one to the empty

humming of bees— buzz. buzz. buzz.

buzz. i’m an open wound, throbbing

in tandem with the bees.

Anushka Bidani is an 18 year old poet and essayist from India. She adores the rain, blue skies, open mic events, the human anatomy, & art in all its distinct magnificent shapes. She's the Founder & Editor-in-chief at Headcanon Magazine. Currently, she writes for Teen Belle Magazine. Her work has been published on the Esthesia Magazine and Sugar Rascals Magazine, & is forthcoming in the Royal Rose Magazine. She writes at

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